#08 Work-life Balance
#08 Work-life Balance
The Autistic Work-in-progress Way
I can’t say I have a well-thought-out idea of achieving a work-life balance. I’ve only just found out I’m autistic, so I’m probably light years from that. There are tons of online articles on the subject, so I’ll not bore you with things you may have already read about. Also, I sometimes write how-to articles, but they’re not really my cup of tea. I’d rather build a more organic, work-in-progress piece of writing. Spontaneity and imperfection should be a key part of my life, and I’m working hard on it. So I don’t want to try to write the perfect text or say the right thing. I’ll just come out and say it. I won’t wait for divine intervention or to become enlightened and wise to start writing about what matters to me. I do want to write but it will never be perfect nor will it represent all autistics’ voices. I’ve got no intention of ever doing that. On that note, let’s get into this week’s topic.
What has a bed got to do with work? Everything. Sometimes my desk and my chair are too far away, and my bed is the safest place in the world.
When I wake up with few spoons, I focus on what needs to get done that day. If a client could offer me an extended deadline I ask for it. Ideally, clients will have you let them know ahead, but sometimes that’s impossible. Sometimes you just can’t make yourself think. Or get out of bed. And that’s as valid a reason as taking a sick day because you’ve got a terrible flu, although many would have us believe otherwise. If you’re in burnout, even if you can’t pinpoint what emotions you’re experiencing, your body needs rest. As an autistic, I appear to have much less energy than the neurotypicals around me. My entire body needs more time to recharge.
Since we’re always under constant pressure to perform well, especially in work settings, we must take care of ourselves as frequently as possible. Most of us can’t go without work and some, when in autistic burnout, have a hard time proving that to access government aid so they can keep themselves afloat during that challenging time. In a nutshell, we must work, somehow, somewhere. And if you happen to have few resources at your disposal or if you need help figuring out your relationship with work as an autistic adult, keep on reading.
To me, there’s a work spectrum: There are two types of work - active and passive. Similarly, there are two kinds of income: active and passive. If you go to work every day, it is active. If you do work that makes you money during your office hours or not, e.g. if you own an online store, your work is more on the passive side of this spectrum I’ve built. Truly, work is tiring no matter what kind it is. But it’s considerably more tiring and stressful when you have to show up every day and be productive for hours on end. If your boss hired you knowing you were autistic, it makes it easier to negotiate accommodations. And if you’ve recently self-identified as autistic, it might be worth it to pursue a formal diagnosis to be able to access workplace accommodations with less friction. Once you get a diagnosis, you can check your rights according to where you live. In Brazil, people with ASD are legally considered disabled, so we’re entitled to many things, including a different work schedule, of one hour less per day. Know your rights, always.
And what kind of accommodations could you ask for?
Adapted schedule
Bear in mind fewer hours might mean you’d get a lower salary. And that is why getting hired for a disabled person job spot is much more appealing to me nowadays. The company and I would settle on a salary upfront. If it’s not what I’m looking for, then no deal. So I wouldn’t have to deal with the complications of getting a potential pay cut due to the accommodations I required after a diagnosis. Another adaptation you could suggest is working only during the time of day when you usually feel the most energetic and ready.
A different job role
Maybe move to a less demanding, tiring role. For instance, maybe teaching large groups or being a manager is taking a heavy toll on you because of the constant contact with other people. If you want to remain in your job role, see if you could perform fewer of the more taxing tasks. It might be possible to share them with a colleague.
Different communication channels
If WhatsApp makes the hairs on your neck stand up every time you think of it, maybe you could switch to a different platform, like email.
Hybrid work
Many companies, especially after the pandemic, offer work-from-home and hybrid work models. (However, I know many are basically telling their employees to look for a job elsewhere if they don’t go back to working in the office). You could run a potential schedule by your supervisor.
Thoughts about self-employment
If you’re self-employed and feeling overwhelmed, you can do some things. I’m self-employed and going through burnout, so I’m treading this ground as we speak.
I’ve been gradually working fewer hours per week since I found out I’m autistic to allow for more rest time. Whenever I have a big project with a tight deadline, I overwork for two days max, and then I have to do a few things to feel remotely OK. For the very next day, I set the alarm for an hour later or more, depending on how exhausted I felt the day before. If I have no projects to be delivered by that day, I set my OOO notice in my email and take the day off. However, if that’s not possible, I:
Take a longer lunch break
Don’t commit to complex/long projects for the next 3 days
Take longer breaks (ideally I would take more frequent pauses, but I often hyperfocus on tasks, so longer breaks seem a better fit, for now)
Prioritize rest, not exercise
I’ll get ahead of myself now and talk about what I want my work life to look like after burnout. And I don’t mean to put my brain under any more stress, but I can’t help but devise a plan B, C, and D most times. So I have been thinking a lot about new income streams (having more than one steady income stream—mine: translation), skills I can develop, and working fewer hours in the long term. I shouldn’t keep putting all the eggs in the same basket. Side note: I’m a translator, and one of my specialties is audiovisual translation, mainly of Hollywood productions. You’ve probably heard Hollywood is not in a good place right now, which impacts the whole industry.
Regardless of these issues, I’m constantly thinking about the next step. I can’t help it! Ideas just suddenly pop up, and I write them down, however ridiculous they may seem. I don’t think you should turn all your passions into work (otherwise, what interests or hobbies are you left with?), but it’s of the utmost importance that I work with something meaningful to me. If I take on an occupation simply for the money, there’s no way I won’t hate it and find it extremely boring and toxic three months later. As a side job, boring work may work for me, but certainly not as my main activity.
If you’re self-employed and want to work fewer hours, here’s something to consider: Calculate your hourly rate (you can use other kinds of rates too) based on how many hours you want to work per week and on how many weeks per year you don’t want to work. Of course, there’s no way of knowing how many days off you’ll need, but you can make a rough estimate.
To calculate my hourly rate, I use a spreadsheet I found on a fellow translator’s blog. I recommend you look for spreadsheets in your field too, because when the person who created it lives in the same country as you, they might’ve considered the taxes you have to pay and included this in the file (in an Excel formula, for instance). Also, in my field people are usually paid per hour, word, or project. So if you were to use the spreadsheet I use, it may not be a good match.
And very important: After you create your new work schedule, you should share it with your clients to help set expectations. You can send an email or simply include it in your email address signature and/or on your website.
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The Refresh Button is a newsletter about autism, neurodiversity, work, and mental health. Thank you for reading. Follow me on Bluesky and Mastodon. See you next week. Love, Renata.
As someone who works from home, this was super useful, thank you!